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Phempis acidula redesign

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moyogijohn
Rob Kempinski
Todd Ellis
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Post  Guest Sat Mar 03, 2012 1:26 pm

Hi IBC.

Summer time is Phempis time.

One of the first victim my eyes spotted in my garden, I feel something is wrong with the direction this design is going,...Hiding too many ugly features inside that foliage mass.

Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0354


I like this new angle and front better.
Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0355

...we'll see where it goes from here.


regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Guest Sat Mar 03, 2012 1:44 pm

Now the difficult stage... Wink

Ouch! Removing the hidden ugly truth...


Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0356



After removing more branches and opening up for fresh air...

Now I can imagine this tree in some sort of cliff or near the sea. but I got to minimize the effect of the straight lower trunk with a minimal inverse taper, and the left side branch which is moving at the different direction.
Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0357


regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Guest Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:20 pm



Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0420

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Post  Todd Ellis Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:21 pm

Hi Jun,
It is hard to know how the trees "really" look with 2 dimensional photos. I liked the feeling/side of the first picture. The tree on the rock looks good. I like your work and always drool over your material. ThumbsUp
Best,
Todd
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Post  Guest Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:25 pm

You hit the bulls eye Todd! hehehe!

regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Guest Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:26 pm

after...

Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0421




regards,
jun Smile





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Post  Todd Ellis Sat Mar 03, 2012 2:42 pm

Sweet!
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Post  Rob Kempinski Sat Mar 03, 2012 4:23 pm

Did you make a semi-raft with the left hand branch on top of the rock?
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Post  moyogijohn Sat Mar 03, 2012 6:12 pm

JUN,, OK Friend,, you have started !!!! It is looking good..take care john

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Post  Guest Sun Mar 04, 2012 12:00 am

Rob Kempinski wrote:Did you make a semi-raft with the left hand branch on top of the rock?



yes Rob. I am going to make it like a shrub of "small Phempis" in that area.
This is how a real Phempis in the wild in some cliff looks like. I am wondering though, why people frequently makes cascade or semicascade when a tree mimics the real one along the cliff edge scratch .


regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Guest Sun Mar 04, 2012 12:01 am

Thanks John and Todd!

I glad you like the design.

regards,
jun Smile

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Post  xuan le Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:39 pm

Nice work Jun, I wonder how it looks if you add some rocks to make the trunk base appear shorter?

Xuan

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Post  Rob Kempinski Sun Mar 04, 2012 8:28 pm

jun wrote:
Rob Kempinski wrote:Did you make a semi-raft with the left hand branch on top of the rock?



yes Rob. I am going to make it like a shrub of "small Phempis" in that area.
This is how a real Phempis in the wild in some cliff looks like. I am wondering though, why people frequently makes cascade or semicascade when a tree mimics the real one along the cliff edge scratch .


regards,
jun Smile

Very creative.
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Post  Guest Mon Mar 05, 2012 6:31 am

Thanks Rob for the kind words!


regards,
jun Smile


Thanks Xuan!


I will develop the tree further and see where it goes from there. Adding the rock now is like giving up on the tree...The rock anyway can always wait.


regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Budi Sulistyo Thu Mar 08, 2012 4:37 pm

Hi Jun,

It is a bonsai into a penjing or saikei.

Budi
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Post  Jesse Thu Mar 08, 2012 9:36 pm

To be perfectly honest, I preferred the original photo of the tree. I'm not 100% sure why. I think I like the way the trunk looked all the way up and preferred that front. Now there seems to be significant reverse taper (it was always there obviously) that is now highlighted. I know that often to be able to progress we have to take a step backward to take additional steps forward in the future which I feel can be very true with respect to bonsai. Could I ask you to talk me through the thought process on these changes? To qualify my comments though I want to make sure that I am clear these are coming from a bonsai amateur for my own learning and understanding. I want to be very clear that I hold your work in very high regards Jun so that fact that I don't see this one from the get go tells me I am missing some of the rationale for making the changes and I would like to become better.

==========

On a different note, would it be possible to carve the tree more to fix the reverse taper since so much carving already took place in that area on the tree? I have no idea how plausible it would be to carve or reduce that area but I made a quick virtual of that section reduced further just to see the difference it would make:


Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0410
Phempis acidula redesign Dsc_0412

Obviously my two cents are based purely on a 2D view of the tree...
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Post  pongsatorn.k Thu Mar 08, 2012 10:04 pm

nice Jun!! Very Happy

if it is my tree, I will cut the branches on the left because it is not flow Very Happy
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Post  Guest Fri Mar 09, 2012 12:36 am

pongsatorn.k wrote:nice Jun!! Very Happy

if it is my tree, I will cut the branches on the left because it is not flow Very Happy


Thanks Pongsatorn!


I would like to respond to your idea of removing the branch........BUT I will ask Jim first if it is ok with him to write it down, because it will be an argument.

regards,
jun Smile

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Post  Guest Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:32 pm

Hi Budi, Jesse and Pongsatorn.

Sorry for the late reply guys. I can't reply to the detailed questions a few days back because this whole composition is just part of the bigger one in the new thread.

Jesse,
Thanks for the PM. I am not giving too much attention to the details of the tree, for the same reason stated above. See the same tree in the new thread? Can you still see the inverse taper? Wink

In penjing, the overall appearance of the whole composition is more important than the individual details of the trees. Good luck with your own penjing attempt.



regards,
jun Smile

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